Enduring a traumatic experience can leave long-term scars. Unfortunately, one of those scars could relate to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-blame. You need to be reminded — often — that you did not ask for it. What happened was not fair and not your fault. In some cases, it was bad luck. You happened to be there when a damaged person lashed out.
Another negative side effect of trauma is the perception it creates. You, as the victim, may feel as if you are defined by what happened. The reality is: You are more than what you went through. Much more.
What is Trauma?
Trauma is the outcome of experiencing or witnessing a terrible event. Theoretically, anything can be traumatic. But there are some common examples, e.g.
Physical, sexual, emotional abuse
Neglect or abandonment
Loss of a loved one
Being victimized by a crime or act of terror
Spending time in a war zone
Accident, injury, illness, or disability
Divorce or separation
Domestic violence
Events like this have the potential to cause serious, long-term issues. One example is Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. This mental health condition can lead to flashbacks, nightmares, depression, social isolation, hyper-vigilance, and more.
How Does Trauma Impact Us?
Trauma can reshape your perspectives, beliefs, ideas, and behaviors. As a survivor of trauma and perhaps of PTSD, you may see the world through a different lens than others. You see danger even when it doesn’t exist. If the trauma happens when you’re very young, you may not even know what it’s like to feel safe. As a result, your day-to-day life is impacted, e.g.
You have a hard time trusting others
Your self-image is distorted
Normal daily functions are a challenge
Trauma can make you feel stuck in the past
And, as mentioned, you have a hard time seeing yourself as anything other than a victim of trauma. With help from a skilled mental health professional, you can shift this view and begin the healing process.
You Are More Than What You Went Through
There is good news: Millions of people have healed from their trauma. Since you had the pain imposed upon you, you may be tempted to wait for someone to remove it. But you can be the agent of change. Being your own change agent is very powerful. Such a recovery helps you eliminate the pain and facilitate real development in your life. For example:
The ability to create and sustain healthy relationships
Reach for your true potential
Handle life’s inevitable ups and downs
Pursue your dreams
Feel independent and capable and free
Develop a willingness to try new things and even take risks
Learn to accept that no one gets through life without physical and emotional scars
Remember: You are not what happened to you. But you may be how you choose to respond. Sure, you will definitely need help and support. Trauma and PTSD cannot be tackled alone or with generic self-help tips. However, again, you are the agent of change. You get to re-write your story. You become the one who decides for yourself how you are defined.
Step One: Ask For Help
PTSD and trauma will tell us lies. They’ll make us fear that we can’t get better. Therefore, it is essential that you reach out for the help you need and deserve. I’d love to talk with you about what you’ve experienced and how it makes you feel. We can begin this process with a free and confidential consultation. I can answer your questions and teach you more about this process. Let’s connect! Let’s have that first conversation and get you moving on the path toward redefining your self-image and overall wellbeing. If you want to read more about how I work with Trauma and PTSD please go to that page.