A big part of managing the holidays for someone with emotional trauma is routine. It helps immensely to maintain steady patterns. This offers a feeling of control and certainty in an often challenging world. If a person with emotional trauma were to get thrown off this kind of schedule, it could result in the intensifying of trauma symptoms. When the holidays kick in, imagining how unpredictable things can feel is not hard.
In addition, holiday events can often involve overindulgence, family drama, and having to interact with people who trigger you. All of the above adds up to a stew of circumstances that must be managed.
The Impact of Emotional Trauma
To experience a traumatic event — especially at a young age — is to learn some unhealthy coping skills. You may become a people pleaser or decide to withdraw it better. Whatever your personal choice, it’ll be driven by a fear of trusting others. This can present interpersonal issues until the trauma is fully processed and resolved. Again, the holiday season can be particularly tough.
While trauma is best treated with the help of a mental health professional, there are effective self-help steps to ease the difficulties this time of year.
How to Manage Emotional Trauma During the Holiday Season
Let’s start with the most obvious and reliable step anyone can take for their overall well-being. When the end-of-the-year festivities feel like too much, the counterbalance is self-care. No law says you have to eat more than usual or indulge in alcohol and caffeine. You also have every right to maintain your workout schedule — even if that means saying no to a couple of invitations.
Most importantly, safeguard your sleep schedule. Trauma is notorious for causing intrusive thoughts, flashbacks, and nightmares. If your sleep becomes erratic, you may become more susceptible to any or all of these. Again, leaving a party early is a self-loving choice if you need to get enough sleep. The people who love you will understand.
Here are a few other tips and suggestions:
Set Boundaries With Family
Yes, this feels like a very daunting task but it’s vital. You likely have some traumatic memories with people you will see at holiday gatherings. Don’t wing it. Take time to think about how you’ll handle certain situations and decide if a particular interaction is something you’ll avoid the year. If necessary, plan out some scripts for how you’ll respond to anyone who tends to trigger you. Remember that new holiday traditions and rituals can be created. If the same old routines will inevitably bring you distress, come up with fresh ideas and invite whomever you want to partake.
You’re Not Obligated to Be Joyous 24/7
Sure, some folks will try to make you feel guilty, but never forget that your emotions are valid, and it’s wise to honor them. Keep in mind that plenty of people are also struggling — even if they don’t mention it. Seek a healthy balance of quality social time and quality recovery time.
At the same time, be cautious to not fall into a resentment trap. If the people around you are having fun, be happy for them. Even if trauma has put a damper on your holiday spirit, there’s no benefit to taking it out on those who have nothing to do with it.
Things Will Get Better With Time and Treatment
Commit to the healing process and practice gratitude for whatever progress you make. With the help of a trauma-focused therapist, can can heal, process, and recover — and reclaim the holidays as a time for smiles. I’d love to help you along the way through trauma therapy. Feel free to read more, by clicking on the link.